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Instead of a three-course meal and flowers, there was craft beer and a buffet of light food. Donna Lindenau, 70, walked into the event hesitantly. Widowed two years ago, she came at the insistence of a friend in Bradenton. As Lindenau lingered around the room, year-old Brian Connolly fearlessly approached several women, asking them one of the ice-breaker questions on his clipboard. Connolly’s exuberant grin and rosy cheeks seemed to make him an ideal candidate for a speed-dating event, where a willingness to put oneself out there is perhaps the most important factor in potential success.
Despite Connolly’s spirit, research shows that people like Lindenau are not alone in their reluctance to date again. On average, women spend about 17 years in widowhood, according to University of South Florida Sarasota-Manatee professor Kathy Black, who focuses on aging studies and social work. Trends differ significantly based on gender, Black added. Among people in their 80s, 4 out of 5 men are still married, compared with only 1 out of 5 women, Black said. In Sarasota, women living alone outnumber men living alone 3-to-1, a ratio in line with national numbers.